Mayor Phil faced worldwide criticism for fleeing his nation of Jefferson County last March during Elk's invasion. Recently, the political leader is making a name for himself again with his retaliatory approach against the armies of the Zugnar Alliance. The revolutionary method of collapsing cities with underground tunnels has Jefferson quickly eradicating the Elk troops occupying the region. In the last week, roughly 16 cities were sunk into the ground, leaving Elk with nothi

A Venango County resident is in shock after being encouraged to "killdeer". This came after he posted an image of an agressive bird with deadly intentions. "I wanted to warn the people that this bird chirped at me rudely." States Talented Personality, a Lancaster native residing in Venango County. "I was walking along and suddenly was attacked by this tiny ferrosious looking bird with a wing span of about two centimeters." Fortunately, Mr. Talented Personality survived the in

The method of collapsing public infrastructure is working in favor of the Pennsylvania Land and Treaty Organization. Jefferson County, who was initially brought to shame by their retreat from the Elk County invasion back in April, has now found redemption from a series of victories unforeseen by the western Pennsylvania world. As of this morning, the Jefferson County Tunnel Hogs, a special division of the Jefferson County military, successfully completed an operation that col

The press has brought a lot of scrutiny to Mayor Blunders over his involvement in erecting a chicken coup octagon on the Outhouse front lawn. His greatest criticism is using county land to host a ruthless contest between flightless birds. Now, the CEO of the Kentucky Fighting Chickens is stepping in to the defense of Blunders. Blunders and Whitemeat dedicate chicken octagon to Venango States Anniversary "KFC is the safest pro fighting sport for animals trying to kill each oth

County War 1 is now observing military engagements across the northwestern Pensylvania region. With soldiers from the Pensylvania Land and Treaty Organization now split on both ends of Route 322, the Allies have two fronts by which they are engaging the enemy. After taking the City of Clarion back from the Elk Empire, Jefferson troops are still tasked with having to repaint the border between Jefferson and Clarion County. Standing in their way are more than 23 Elk soldiers ar

The Venango County Military alongside Mercer soldiers are marching closer to the City of Meadville where Mayor Dogfood has been taken hostage. Accompanying them are the two German shepherd soldiers armed with Meow Mix who were originally sent by West Crawford for Venango's defense. It has been several days since the armies were sent to recapture West Crawford from the enemies of Mercer, Elk, and East Crawford. Despite the journey only requiring 9 hours on foot, the armies wer

The City of Clarion can finally celebrate liberation from the Elk Empire thanks to the genius military tactics performed by Jeferson County tunnel hog soldiers. At 8 PM Monday evening, an operation took place to catch the Elk soldiers laying siege to Clarion by surprise. The county capital, which has been covered in snow for months, gave way to a series of tunnels dug beneath the city to collapse its foundation. Now, Clarion is free from Elk rule and can live continuously kno

The industrial City of Millcreek is on the brink of collapse after a Facebook post revealed a traffic light requiring contradicting acts. The man posting the picture is reportedly not blind and capable of at least knowing what colors go where, suggesting that the picture has only been doctored with the addition of the arrow. After the post, the town was instantly devastated by tensions never before seen on an economic scale. Between looting, protests turned ugly, and that guy

The war is far from over as the Pensylvania Land and Treaty Organization works to regain the lost counties taken by the Zugnar Alliance. The recent success in regaining the entirety of Venango County has instilled hope throughout the known world of Western Pensylvania. As troops progress into the outer regions of West Crawford and Clarion, those residing in the Venango States of America are relieved to know they are finally free. Political powers have learned a huge lesson fr

A heated debate in Allegheny County has business owners arguing against the proposal of an 18-week paid leave for pregnant mothers. Now, a counterproposal is building more tension among the locals with the suggestion of free child labor to offset the paid time off. We here at the Venango Republic recognize the level of backlash satire like this could bring upon our respectable organization. Consequently, we have decided to use an alternative meaning for the phrase "child labo

Shots have been fired near the Boston Store in downtown Erie with many citing what sounded like a discharge of Meow Mix. 3 Elk were observed laying on the edge of State Street disillusioned by what reportedly may be cat food striking them in the face. The incident occurred just moments ago and suggests an uprising of former West Crawford soldiers forming a rebellion. The West Crawford military was disbanded roughly two weeks ago when Elk County took over their nation. East Cr

For readers residing outside of Venango County, one of our local restaurants now has a protective barrier featuring a guide rail less than six feet long. We don't really have many issues with cars flying into that restaurant, but it seems the city felt the need to place a barrier there anyways. To add to the confusion, those driving on Benjamin's side still get to keep two lanes. However, the one on the far left must turn left now. Images depicting the before and after effect

The six militaries of the Pennsylvania Land and Treaty Organization are now putting up a fight to escape the entrapment of the Elk Empire. Just less than a month after Venango County was reduced to the size of Oil City, all forces guarding the Venango States Capital are now progressing outward to regain the regions overtaken by Mayor Bighorn's soldiers. Western Pennsylvania last April on the left. Western Pensylvania now on the right. Marching toward the border of the Crawfor

Minutes ago, Laurel and Hardy of the Venango County military successfully executed an operation that ensured the repossession of their lost industrial City of Franklin. According to reports by President Mayor Blunders of the Venango States of America, special ops armed with spitball launchers and 4th of July poppers were able to eradicate one of the Elk Empire's highest ranking leaders. Blunders is now standing before the press gloating of the success. "Caribou Buckar Wapiti

A campaign has begun to overthrow the Elk Empire through massive operations never before seen. As Venango County troops march toward Franklin heavily armed with spitballs and muffin hand grenades, Jefferson County's military is taking combat beneath the Earth. An elite force known as Tunnel Hogs have been working tirelessly in a top secret campaign to cave in the entirety of Cranberry. This came after Elk County successfully reduced Venango to the size of Oil City. With Mayor

A new controversy has risen, putting the treaty between Washington and Allegheny County at risk. President Mayor George Washington of Washington, capital of Washington County, is being accused by Mayor Steelhead of stealing Mount Washington. On the south side of Pittsburgh, the mountain has officially gone missing. Mayor Steelhead on the left, Mayor George Washington on the right. The sudden absence of the mountain was noticed this morning when residents noted it was not ther

With the recent success of overthrowing the nation of Indiana County, the Elk military have finalized their campaign in branding Western Pennsylvania with the image of their species on the west side of the state. According to information provided by the Allegheny Allergen, the Elk Empire has split Westmoreland County right down the center, dividing it into what will now be known as Westlessland and Eastlessland. Both regions are to be governed under the authority of Mayor Big

Mayor Steelhead of Pittsburgh announced to the press today that Lawrence County has been struck by a steel beam. This came after an executive order for the Allegheny military to perform operations of retaliation. Last week, Lawrence County struck the heart of Allegheny’s capital with a firework launched tens of miles away. Now, New Castle, capital of Lawrence County, is finding itself on the receiving end of such an attack. “We have shown them the might of our culture,” Steel

President Mayor Blunders of the Venango States of America issued an executive order early Monday morning to recapture lost land now under control of the Elk Empire. In a press briefing, Blunders stated that the operation was top secret, but that it would consist of one soldier attempting to regain a portion of Route 8 roughly an hour from the time of his speech. When word came to Blunders that the plan had been compromised and that Elk military were on their way to protect Ro

On a cold Friday morning, Indiana County soldiers anxiously await an unavoidable conflict promised to strike their northern border. As privates sit and sip their coffee, an unexpected barrage of Nerf darts fire upon their strongholds. Indiana soldiers prior to nerf attacks Indiana County has not seen war ever since 1887, when Jefferson County broke free from the Christmas tree capital of the world, establishing the Groundhog Day Accord. After Jefferson County liberated themse