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Social Media Denial Over Lousy Halftime Show
For the most part, the Super Bowl halftime show is typically trash. Not for the fact that the performance put together is unimpressive, but simply for the fact that we see the same thing every year. An artist comes on stage with flashy lights, crowds of dancers on the field, and some combination of stage props that convert into multi-dimensional sceneries Despite being different each year, each performance has the same level of quality, leaving us unimpressed. The halftime sh

Jeremy Jetfuel
Feb 124 min read


Can the Winter Olympics Truly Compete with Franklin on Ice for Viewers?
Are you kidding?????????

Jeremy Jetfuel
Feb 31 min read


How the Winter Olympics Hopes to Compete with Franklin on Ice
The world is waiting anxiously for the biggest annual event this side of isolation. With the 2026 Franklin On Ice event kicking off this Saturday, many are excited to watch chainsaws massacre chunks of frozen residue in an attempt to create majestic figures that probably won't last the weekend. What does this mean on an international level? Absolutely nothing! But we are still going to exaggerate, hoping it brings the boom days back! Experts fear once again that coverage of t

Jeremy Jetfuel
Feb 32 min read


White Americans Consider Changing Color to Help End Racism
For hundreds of years, white people have failed to take accountability for the offensive hue of their skin. Imagine being a black man trying to enjoy your daily stroll in the hood only to have some bald biker blind you with the sun reflecting off his head. It is time for people to wake up! Fortunately, a generation of young college aged white students have figured out everything the generations before them couldn't get right, and they haven't even graduated with their masters

Jeremy Jetfuel
Jan 172 min read


Greenland Gains Sudden Popularity After Everyone Ignores It for Centuries
The world is preparing for the scariest moment it has faced since that virus with a 99 percent survival rate killed a bunch of people. Reports state that without context, President Trump will do things the “hard way” if Denmark refuses the easy way. Whatever the hell that means. Meanwhile, the world reacts to the king of vague statements, implying that he intends an invasion. I mean… he technically did not say that himself. It could be he means it, but the phrase “hard way” c

Jeremy Jetfuel
Jan 162 min read


Maduro Announces Retirement After Change in Life Circumstances
The President of Venezuela has announced today that he will be stepping down due to a change in life circumstances. According to sources, President Maduro feels that Venezuela is no longer home to him and has officially decided that it is time to move on from his presidency. “I just feel like I have so much going on right now. That life is taking me away from my work,” states Maduro. “I would love to get back to leading this nation. But unfortunately, my hands are completely

Jeremy Jetfuel
Jan 121 min read


Venezuela Attempts Presidential Capture, Cited for Crossing Illegally
The Venezuelan military is facing deportation after failing to cross legally. Based on sources we made up, a group of military personnel crossed into the U.S. attempting to capture the President. Unfortunately, they broke the law by forgetting their visa. "We are fortunate to have caught these men when we did." States an ICE agent who doesn't exist. "We understand they want to get back at us. But there's a legal way to kidnap the president, and there's the way they went about

Jeremy Jetfuel
Jan 122 min read


Some People See Terror Where Others See Panic: Where's the Gray Area?
We here at the Venango Republic stand by our word when we say that our goal is to tick everyone off. Due to a series of articles that consistently point out the hypocrisies of one side, we feel that it is time we point out the hypocrisies of another side of an issue. This time, we go after the conservatives who wildly exaggerate the motives of a woman who just wanted to drive off, thinking that the agent would jump out of the way. Granted, we acknowledge that the agent did no

Jeremy Jetfuel
Jan 103 min read


Ten Dead People Who Haven't Made National News this Week
We here at the Venango Republic believe in freedom of speech, freedom of the press, and freedom of hypocrisy. We also believe in the right to expose hypocrisy for the sake of comical relief. Why try to please everyone when you can make everyone mad? A lot of attention has been given to some random woman who got shot in the face on Wednesday. Obviously, the nation must mourn due to the politics surrounding her death. Whether she was a complete prick with Karen like tendencies,

Jeremy Jetfuel
Jan 83 min read


Canada Announces Border Wall: "We're Sick of Being Polite"
A recent flow of illegal immigrants has North America taking drastic measures to protect their borders. According to reports issued by the department of Keep the South Away, Mexicans are setting their eyes into the neighboring nation of Canada. "We just need to face the facts that there just isn't enough room for all these Mexicans" states one man we conveniently made up to justify this quote. Matters are growing exponentially with the rise of Mexican heritage crowding up Nor

Jeremy Jetfuel
Dec 29, 20252 min read
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