Mayor Blunders Weighs in on Israel's Conflict with Palestine: Sounds Like A Moron When He Does

Venango County has arguably become Northwestern Central Pennsylvania's greatest superpower with the exclusion of every other county surrounding it. With so much influence among other superpowers, to the exclusion of every superpower outside of it, Mayor Blunders feels that it is time for him to weigh in on the Israel and Palestine conflict.

"This conflict over juice and hummus must end!" states Mayor Blunders, who misheard the religious labels as sources of bodily nourishment. "We understand that Israel's obsession with healthy drinks is not likely to coexist with a sloppy brown mush. Nonetheless, Palestine and Israel must learn to embrace each other's food preferences. The violence must end!"

According to experts, Mayor Blunders is an idiot... We really cannot say much more than that!

"If the juice cannot make a peace treaty with the hummus, we will have no choice but to intervene!" states the Mayor, who still hasn't found the coffee can containing the city treasury.

Mayor Blunders has warned Venango County that the "Venango States of America" may be forced to hold a draft to recruit "able-bodied men..." Unfortunately, the county is so malnourished after his proposal to secede from the United States, there are no able-bodied men left.

When tested on his knowledge about Israel and Palestine, Mayor Blunders seemed confused as to what part of the world they exist in. In fact, like the rest of the county, he still believes nothing exists beyond the Clarion border. Mayor Blunders was asked where the two nations existed. This was his reply:

"Aren't those the two feuding towns just north of Pleasantville?"