Oil City Mayor Declares Vanango County Has Successfully Landed on the Moon

It's official! According to political leaders in Oil City, Pennsylvania, the Moon landing is a success with three astronauts currently embarking on the exploration of the lunar surface.

VASA's mission to launch a rocket ship to the Moon, transporting three astronauts along the way, has been in the works for almost a month now. After tensions between East Crawford and Venango County rose again, Mayor Dumdum of Titusville, capital of East Crawford County, announced his intentions to further space exploration in honor of the Titusville Rockets football team.

Mayor Blunders of Oil City, capital of Venango County, responded to Mayor Dumdum's statement, announcing that he would, by the end of this year, successfully launch a rocket to the Moon with three astronauts aboard. As of this morning, Mayor Blunders announced that it had successfully happened and that we can now officially prove what kind of cheese the Moon is made out of.

Ad

With much skepticism surrounding Mayor Blunder's claim of landing on the Moon, the self-declared president of Venango County states that he is prepared to prove that the Venango States of America has completed their mission. Despite only having a 12-inch rocket to house the three six-foot tall astronauts, Blunders insists that they were able to fit aboard the shuttle which propelled them into the air.

Now with the space race finally reaching new heights, Titusville must exceed the accomplishments of Venango County by finding the next terrestrial solid to land a ship with people on board. Without this success, they will still be known as the county that only managed to launch a rocket 10 feet off the ground.

As for the three astronauts aboard, the leader of the group, known as Sit Leg-Weak, became the first to set foot on the surface of the Moon. On a nationally televised event, Mr. Leg-Weak was heard verbalizing, “One tiny step for me. And boy, this is a giant piece of Velveeta cheese.”

Millions of people watched on a Facebook Live event, with an estimated 59 viewers, taking part in the historic moment. To date, this is truly Venango County's greatest accomplishment.