Oil City Fountain Has No Coins: Citizens Too Poor To Wish

It's been 12 years since Oil City elected to install an expensive fountain outside the ugliest building in town. Ever since the decision was made to build the fountain, people have had no money to make a wish.

"I've been waiting 7 years to wish for a job" says Freddie Freeloader "I had money in 2012, but no fountain to throw it into. I donated to the cause, and now have a fountain with no money to throw into it."

Many residents are growing weary of their situation. "We know all it takes is a single wish to get this town back to what it was. That's why we paid between 150 to 220 grand (No joke... actual number: source) to make this happen" Says Margaret Hifflepuffle "unfortunately, the fountain depleted our funds so much, I barely have enough to buy bread."

Oil City residents are optimistic that someone will one day have the means to sacrifice a coin for the fountain. "A quarter would be ideal" says the city treasurer "penny wishes are possible. But a quarter will make getting back that 220 grand we wasted on this fountain more likely to happen. Then we can start using that money for bigger wishes!"

The Mayor has reached out to the state capital requesting 25 cents for operation "make a wish." In his executive order, he declares the first wish to be for the city to make back its 220 grand. Secondly, once that money is collected, the city treasurer is to dump all of it back into the fountain and make a wish for better industry. The Mayor estimates these wishes will take 5 minutes a piece if we contribute the right amount of funds.