Top Ten Things to Do in Venango And Surrounding Region

Venango County is the center of nothingness. A region consisting of so little to do, the state governor has considered turning it into a state penitentiary. Locals of the area are so proud of their boring habitation that researchers at Clarion University are trying to figure out what is wrong with them.

We here at the Venango Republic believe in optimistically emphasizing the positive attributes of a community....

Yeah... We got nothing....

Nonetheless, we are going to try, and we mean REALLY TRY our best at finding the top ten things to do in Venango County and the surrounding regions. We included surrounding regions so we could exceed the number 3.

10. The "City" of Pithole

The City of Pithole, which consists of one resident 50 acres away, and technically has no buildings... I mean it literally is just a field... Why do we call this a city?

9. Random Stump

Random Stump is an iconic location loved by the locals. Located in the middle of nowhere, Random Stump was once one of many trees. This particular tree got cut down. The workers left this stump behind.

8. Oil City

NO!

7. Marijuana

Now legal for anyone with a medical card, Marijuana is used by locals who desperately want to leave but can't afford to do so.

6. Alcohol

Much like Marijuana, locals trapped by poverty turn to this substance to cope. It is legal until you do something stupid and have to face a judge. It is currently Oil Cities main form of currency.

5. Bridge Lights

The 88 thousand dollar lights used to cover up the rust of this bridge attracts roughly 0 people per year. This not so amazing spectacle simply illuminates and does nothing else, leaving that extremely rare visitor wondering why the heck he drove all the way to see this crap. People unable to afford the drive can achieve the discounted version of this site by buying cheap LED's off Amazon to put around their kitchen counters.

4. Overpriced Fountain

One of the unique features of the Oil City fountain is it's covering that stays on 3/4ths of the year. The sad excuse for a city spent 150 to 220 thousand on this thing, yet no one ever bothers to make a wish. The biggest appeal of this attraction is the building crumbling behind it.

3. Cranberry Mall

These people were photoshopped. Nobody actually ever comes here. But hey! If you do make it past the potholes, there's really nothing to do inside.

2. Franklin

This is literally the only thing Venango County has going for it. There are actual restaurants here that no one will drive 1 hour to get to, but may stop by if they are just passing through. The leaders of this town don't try to act like they're the biggest thing since pastrami, and consequently, have some interesting events like the Blues and BBQ festival and Apple fest. They have interesting businesses inclusive of a couple music shops, clothing stores, and even a furniture shop that surprisingly does well. What makes them worth a visit is that they don't have any inflated ego like Oil City, who tends to brag that they "used to have big industry."

1. Alcoholics Anonymous

Alcoholics Anonymous is growing very popular in the region. Although it is meant to be a public meeting where people anonymously share their stories, the county is considering dropping the word "Anonymous" since literally everybody attends. Stop by and enjoy the county gossip club. Nothing stays secret among residents. As long as you don't tell anyone outside the county what you hear, you are all good. Meetings take place every week at the Oil City pub. Drinks are on the house every Saint Patrick's day.