Woman Who Claims She's "Just Browsing" Leaves Store With A Kayak

A local woman has become the talk of social media this weekend after entering a store to simply "browse." According to sources, Mrs. Martha Moneytree entered a store to simply kill time but somehow managed to pack her car for a vacation. Her car was so full after the store visit, the weight of it caused a sinkhole to form in downtown Franklin.

"The vibes of shopping were just too powerful for me to overcome" states Mrs. Moneytree, who recently wasted an entire paycheck on another Live, Laugh, Love sign for her living room.

Mrs. Moneytree has been struggling to save money in her bank after learning that her husband can't legaly prevent her from having a debit card. Ever since recieving one in the mail, she has made herself a walking stereotype of female compulsion.

Dr. Stereotype, a professor of political incorrectness at the University of Clarion, states that Mrs. Moneytree is likely spending this money because "she is a woman." According to the board of directors at the University of Clarion, Dr. Stereotype does not work for them and keeps sneaking in without their knowlege.

Mrs. Moneytree states that she has tried to get over this shopping obsession. She has even tried moving to North Western PA where there are no stores with interesting things to buy. Unfortunately, she has been able to make the drive to Erie and waste her money there.

Despite it all, Mrs. Moneytree says she has no regrets—except for maybe the $89 she spent on a decorative ladder that holds exactly one blanket and serves no structural purpose whatsoever.