What Exists Outside Venango County: Experts Weigh in

It has always been a mystery what lies beyond the border of Venango County. Locals have wondered for generations if life exists outside the region and if it is even safe to venture into the lands beyond. In recent decades, families have become concerned about the consequences of setting foot into the outer rim as studies show that no one who does ever seems to return.

With several families losing contact with loved ones who wander into the forbidden lands, experts have been desperately trying to find an answer as to what exists outside. Several clinical studies have been conducted in recent years with no conclusive explanation. Nonetheless, theories are rising with plausible suggestions.

The most recent theory to come to light is the suggestion that the land outside the border is not actually there. Experts state that there is a chance that the Earth is flat and that people stepping onto the supposed land immediately fall through to nothing. The strongest evidence to support this claim stems from the fact that the people conducting these studies are qualified morons.

Another common explanation among scientists is the idea that dinosaurs still exist and are eating everyone who leaves the bubble. Wanna be Doctor Ken Wagatail states that he is certain of the possibility that monstrous creatures still roam the Earth because his wife just purchased a purse made of reptile skin. Where this theory struggles is in the fact that the material of her purse is not authentic because no one in the county can afford reptile.

The final theory that the scientists seem to be ignoring is the possibility that life thrives beyond the border of the county. Dr. Wrinkle Remover posted to Facebook earlier this week expressing his doubts. "There is no evidence of life outside of these hills. Venango County is the Eden of our world and possibly the wealthiest place in Venango County. Boredom is a paradise and we must accept this as reality." Dr. Wrinkle Remover is backed by his third grade homeschool Baptist education.

The evidence for life outside of Venango has been disputed for decades. Those who remained after the collapse of the oil industry have argued about whether the people who left the county survived their journey to find new lands. There has only been evidence of life beyond the border once when a man approaching walked towards us with a giant smile. Once he crossed into Venango County, his smile left and the boredom put him into cardiac arrest.

People may never know the answer as to what lies beyond the border. Those with vehicles can only afford enough gas to make it about ten miles from Oil City before walking back to purchase more. They technically can't purchase more, however, because they wasted it on what got them stuck in the first place. This dilemma forces locals to speculate what they are missing on the rest of this planet and if it is something worth knowing about.