Venango County Overtakes Franklin, Regains Lost Territory

Minutes ago, Laurel and Hardy of the Venango County military successfully executed an operation that ensured the repossession of their lost industrial City of Franklin. According to reports by President Mayor Blunders of the Venango States of America, special ops armed with spitball launchers and 4th of July poppers were able to eradicate one of the Elk Empire's highest ranking leaders. Blunders is now standing before the press gloating of the success.

"Caribou Buckar Wapiti Dady is dead." Blunders states in this live transcription of his current press briefing. "He died like an Elk. He died like a coward, whimpering and crying as he crawled to his basement where he illuminated his vest. Our K2 unit did not make it."

Blunders accompanied by sleepy Clarion and Jefferson mayors

Blunders is right. The K2 unit, consisting of untrained miniature poodles, could not make it to the fight because the military accidentally left them behind in Oil City. Instead, they chased the Elk leader into his basement where he switched on his LED-powered vest and threw it at the soldiers. Venango Special Ops dodged the vest before firing on the enemy with spitballs. Wapiti Dady was struck in the neck five times before instantly dying of covid.

With Franklin now in the possession of Venango County, the Zugnar Alliance is now split down the middle. The passage of Route 322 stretching between Clarion and Meadville is no longer completely controlled by the Elk Empire or Crawfordiot Union. The allies of the Pennsylvania Land and Treaty Organization, also known as PLATO, may now continue progressing both directions in an attempt to overthrow the enemy of Warren, East Crawford, and Elk County.

"They didn't even go through the door." Blunders states this very second. "If you were a normal person, you would say knock knock and go through the door. But they blasted their way in with poppers they bought from Sheetz."

You read that correctly. This infrastructure was so bad that even 4th of July celebration poppers managed to blow the door off its hinges.

Much more work is to be done in the near future if the Elk Empire is to be overthrown by the Pennsylvania Land and Treaty Organization. Mayor Intellect of Clarion, and Mayor Phil of Punxsutawney, are now in discussion of how to advance their troops stealthfully eastward down 322 to take the Elk by surprise. Venango faces the same dilemma in freeing Mayor Dogfood from East Crawford's hold. The recent proposed plan can be observed below...

Venango in light blue moving west. Clarion and Jefferson in gold moving east.

The Elk will hopefully never see it coming.