Titusville Man Enters County Witness Protection Program, Recognized at Bingo Night

Ronald Forehead may have been spotted alive and well according to sources. A bingo event known to draw all 32 Titusville residents consisted of one more individual than usual. Forehead, who entered the Titusville Witness Protection Program last week after observing an 11 year old make off with another kids scooter, showed up in the exact same hat posing with the name "Not-Ronald Forehead."

Locals were taken back at first when seeing the man who looked exactly like the one who entered the Titusville Witness Protection Program last week. "I almost cried" said Foreheads mother, who for some reason does not have a forehead. "I was worried I would never see him again until he showed up. Then, when this look alike showed up, I thought it could be my little Ronald."

Unfortunately, Mrs. Forehead had to learn the truth that this was just a man who looked exactly the same as her son. Although disapointed, she was grateful to have a moment like she did feeling the joy of seeing her possibly diseased child. And yes, we meant to spell it that way. We don't know what he may have picked up during his time away!

The look alike to Mr. Forehead was polite but made sure everyone was aware that he was not actually the guy they were thinking of. He also was very transparent that even the DNA he left behind could be an exact match because he accidentally rubbed up against Foreheads gravestone earlier.

The entire town is disapointed but still welcomed the new face to their town. They played bingo and gave Not-Ronald Forehead a standing ovation for being such a sport during their moment of grief. When Not-Ronald Forehead left the facility, he drove off into the sunset and was burned to a crisp.