Second Wave Takes Out No Loitering Sign: Mall Cop Forced to Surrender

Military action agains the Mall in Kearsarge is finally showing progress after the second wave of Venango County soldiers successfully took out the no "loitering sign." The event took place at 2 PM Wednesday after 5 hours of muffin strikes left the south side parking lot full of muffins. Laurel and Hardy of the Venango County Military relentlessly tossed everything they had in their muffin carrying bags before charging ahead to recolect the muffins, retreat, and repeat the process of throwing muffins at the sign.

Five hours passed, and with every muffin throw, the soldiers morale weakened. That is, until the mall cop who chased them away the day before, showed up and crashed into the sign. According to artificial intelligence, the car came by way of the wall behind it....

With the "no loitering" sign finally destroyed, the Mall Cop has lost authority to move tresspassers along. Laurel and Hardy are able to continue military opperations without the fear of the anyone driving them away. Muffin strikes on the Mall are expected to resume as soon as Laurel and Hardy are done taking a nap.