Pigeon Poops on Oil City... Civic Improvement

An anonymous pigeon was seen flying over Oil City today when the unthinkable happened. According to eye witnesses, the pigeon dropped a massive turd covering half of the ugliness that exists.

"This was a major answer to prayer" says one resident we made up for the sake of this quote "I have to walk outside every day. It takes every bit of my willpower not to vomit by what I see!"

Mayor Blunder is especially happy by what he has observed. According to blunder, a pigeon is the city version of a dove, which in ancient times, symbolized purity. "I understand that city pigeons are filthy animals" says Mayor Blunder "but they are the closest thing we have to pure in this town. That's why I truly believe that turd was sent by God."

Oil City has been neck and neck with the city of Cleveland for the title of ugliest town. Although both towns now have poop associated with their reputation, Mayor Blunder believes this turd is an exception. "Bird poop is white life a dove. This turd literally covered up what was making us compete with Cleveland."

Cleveland on the other hand, is known for the sewage they historically pumped into the Cuyahoga River, the river that runs through Cleveland (DUH!). Cleveland has become so famous for their poop infested river, their professional football team is named the Browns.

When asked if he would consider naming Oil Cities major sports team after the pigeon poop that fell, Mayor Blunder stated "what major sports team?"