Oil City Unveils Bold Tourism Strategy: Clean Storefronts Once a Month

In a move unlike anything Oil City has ever seen in the past, the Oil City Main Street Program, in collaboration with city officials, met this week to put together an initiative to ask store owners to clean the front of their businesses once a month. This is no joke. Rather than encouraging businesses to invest in advertisement, or even offering funds to get the word out that we exist, they literally just got together to encourage every business owner to bleach the front of their stores. Don't believe us? Here's your proof...

We're not quite sure what the Oil City Main Street Program and city officials are trying to insinuate about the hard-working business owners downtown. Are they suggesting that the owners don't do enough to make sure the fronts of their stores are clean? Or have they just run out of funds and ideas to justify putting in any effort to revive this town? One thing's for sure. Based on the video posted to the Oil City Main Street Program Facebook page, they are actually confident that some guy in Allegheny County is going to be drawn to us over a once a month practice. “Finally, they used Windex and swept the sidewalks. It's now worth the drive from Pittsburgh just to buy a rug and a couple cartons of milk.”

We don't want to mock too many things. Oil City has put in some pretty big efforts to make events happen downtown. For instance, First Friday has drawn quite a few people. Bridge Fest this past year was eventful with the implementation of the Lobster Truck. And Light Up Night falling on First Friday this year ensured several people showing up. We can even mention that the implementation of the Oil City Exchange is a nice touch along with talks of the new hotel, which we have yet to see if it can survive.

All that to say, some efforts are actually proving to be successful. This initiative, however, is still hilarious. Did we really need to get the whole city council together to ask business owners to sweep up the front of their stores? You could have just posted this on Facebook with a smiley emoji. "Hey, don't forget, sweep up your sidewalks. And be sure to use Windex."

Grant it, they likely met for other things during this meeting. But talking about this initiative like it's the biggest game changer sounds a bit overconfident. To think, the population has dropped by over ten thousand people in the last 20 years and whole issue was just making sure the leaves stay off the sidewalk. What fools we have been to neglect this simple task!

If you think it's worth getting together to make this half-hearted initiative, who am I to judge? I'm only a comedy news writer who dedicates his life to finding the ironies in western Pensylvania. Thanks for the material. This discussion about cleaning storefronts once a month certainly sounds more worth it than addressing this 15-year-long trend on the north side of town...

We'll get to you later mini Detroit. We have storefronts to bleach.