Oil City to Pay 500 Thousand to Advertise Lack of Funds

Mayor Blunders is recognizing the severity of Oil Cities economic standing. With so much of the City treasury depleted, there seems to be little hope in reviving the interest this town once possessed. Nonetheless, people are desperate. So much, that Mayor Blunders has requested the capital send him 500 thousand dollars for an advertising campaign which will help the rest of America see our needs.

"We really need America to help contribute" says Mayor Blunders "not only is this a crucial time, but there is a lot of history that needs preserved." Mayor Blunders doesn't know exactly what that history is. He just hears people say it so much he assumes it's true.

The advertising campaign will consist of several commercials with some random old guy asking for 10 cents then comparing the asking price to a cup of coffee. According to Blunders, Oil Cities greatness depends entirely on showing the world how poor we are.

"We need the world to see that we are great because we used to be even though we aren't anymore" says Mayor Blunders "that is why I feel we must advertise our poverty. Nothing screams greatness like letting people see our rundown town. The difference is that we'll emphasize our history so people look past the disgusting stuff."

It is estimated that roughly nobody, give or take nobody, will care about how great Oil City used to be. This presents a problem with the concept of spending 500 thousand on this campaign. Nonetheless, Mayor Blunders is convinced that this is necessary.

"It will take almost half a million to bring in the businesses we need to revive this town" says Mayor Blunders "putting 500 thousand down on this campaign is essential to raise the money."