Mayor Blunders Finds Coffee Can with No Money Inside

With it being roughly three years since Mayor Blunders lost the coffee can containing the city treasury, many have adapted to the reality that Oil City may never again have usable currency. That is, unless the reports of Blunders finding the can are actually true.

According to sources, Mayor Blunders may have located the coffee can he used to store all $25 the city had saved over the past 30 years. Unfortunately, based on information gathered from fictional witnesses, the can was empty when he opened it.

Blunders speculates that the can was opened at some point by curious handlers who failed to read the inscription he "wrote" on it. We here at The Venango Republic caught a glimpse of our third-grade mayor’s handwriting. It was just a doodle of a puppy urinating on a tree. According to the mayor, that was supposed to be some kind of sign that the can belonged to the city.

With the treasury now missing for good, Mayor Blunders has still declared a celebration to commemorate finding his now-worthless coffee can. A parade featuring the Oil City High School band will take place tomorrow morning. Spectators are welcome to bring their earmuffs to the event.

OOOOOO! Was that in poor taste? We just meant in case it gets cold… or in case the band plays…