Mayor Blunders Declares Potholes Natural Speedbumps to Reduce City Budget

The potholes are becoming just as plentiful as the potheads. Ironically, Mayor Blunders has an admiration for both it seems. According to sources, Blunders wants to keep the potholes in the region growing and even add more to help avoid paying for speedbumps.

In a recent press briefing Mayor Blunders declared that potholes were "the perfect solution for keeping those idiot drivers in check." Following the press briefing, Blunders accidentally spilled his alphabet soup all over his lap while trying to drive through the Cranberry Mall parking lot.

Blunders suffered 3rd degree burns and immediately sued McDonald's for "failing to ward him the soup was hot....." It was Blunders wife who made the soup..... Not McDonald's.....

Later that day, Blunders could be seen holding a shovel in the middle of Route 8 trying to break through the concrete. Fortunately, he didn't have the muscle to lift the shovel and broke his back trying. Unfortunately, he is still alive....