Local Post Office Celebrates 250 Years of Other People's Work

The United States Postal Service celebrated 250 years of existence this week with pictures of staff flooding articles... well, technically one article written by a local nobody. The buzz was so huge, 5 people commented their congratulations while the rest of us dropped our packages off at UPS.

Reaching 250 years is a major accomplishment for a business. Although this one is technically mandated by the government to exist, we'll still cut them slack since they lost over nine billion last year. They could use as much love as they can get. However, we still have a complaint and feel that the post office owes an explanation.

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In an article posted by Explore Venango, the local post office submitted a picture of their current staff but failed to include everyone from the last 250 years. This was quite a shock considering the current staff likely make up less than one percent of the 250 years of back-breaking work. This also fails to account for the generations of mailmen trying to survive German Shepherds when dropping off their clients’ Rolling Stone magazine.

It goes without saying that the countless workers from past generations deserve more recognition than what they got this past week. For this reason, the Venango Republic has taken this initiative to digitally insert the ghosts of these past workers into the image with the current workers. We have removed the faces of the current employees because they already got their moment of fame... plus we don't want to be sued.

Actually ghosts of past workers.

We here at the Venango Republic would like to thank these workers for showing up today. We understand that being dead means you are typically sleeping. So taking time out of your schedule for an AI photoshoot means a lot to the people who don't really give a crap.

Also, thank you for your service. Delivering our letters on time was a noble deed even if you did lose your lives to those German Shepherds. We will never forget.