Journalist Investigated for Manslaughter: Karen Dies Watching Jimmy Carr

A local journalist is being investigated after a woman died watching a video he sent to her. Jeremy Jetfuel is the only journalist for the Venango Republic, and is currently writing this article.

In an attempt to gain notoriety, Jetfuel shared an article to a Facebook page where your typical Karen, whose name was Karen Bowlmovement, responded with disgust.

"You have no right to post this!" Stated Bowlmovement "I'm going to report you to your job for exercising freedom of speech!"

In an attempt to show this Karen things could be worse, Jetfuel posted a Jimmy Carr stand up routine. "I didn't know she would watch it" Said me.... I'm Jeremy Jetfuel... "I posted the video thinking she would know who he is and from there exercise good judgement."

Evidence suggests Bowlmovement either didn't know of Jimmy Carr, or poorly judged her limits. After watching the video, she died of cardiac arrest.

The Venango Republic is shocked by this event and has reached out to the parents of the late Bowlmovement.

"We are so happy you killed her" says Bob, father of the late Bowlmovement "we literally could not stand that b******************************************************************************************."

Bob Bowlmovement has just deposited 200 dollars to the Oil City swear jar.

"We could tell she was a Karen the night we conceived her" says Leslie Bowlmovement, Wife of Bob Bowlmovement and mother of the late Bowlmovement "I'm genuinely a sweetheart. But after conception, I acted so demonic, my husband asked if I was possessed. I looked at him wide eyed and said 'I think I conceived a Karen.' We were immediately in fear of what we had created. Sure enough, I gave birth to that b*************************************************************************************************."

This just in, swear jar puts Oil City in the black.

The Bowlmovement's did everything they could to keep their daughter away from the public eye while raising her. This resulted in excessive stress that put them on the verge of insanity. It wasn't until they moved to Venango County that their daughter found a community she could relate to.

The Venango Republic has offered to pay reparations for the contribution we made to Bowlmovement's death. The parents of the late Bowlmovement state that they should be paying us for the salvation we brought to the world.

The Bowlmovement's have offered the Venango Republic 25 thousands dollars in the form of a cashiers check thanking us for putting their daughter into cardiac arrest.

The Venango Republic was somewhat shocked by such a proposal. To think! Two parents offering money as a reward for their daughter Karen's death?!?!?!

We accepted the money because we want the public to hate us...

The Venango Republic will use the funds for a good cause. We will buy a jack hammer to mar Karen's grave.