Interviewing Oil City Residents On the Mayors Recent Decisions

Mayor Blunders has become a subject of controversy in the last week with many poor decisions resulting in worse poverty than the town has ever known. Citizens of Oil City are divided over whether or not he should be impeached because of his reckless endeavors. We sent our stone Mason George Washington out to ask residents their thoughts on the Mayors recent mistakes.

So far, Oil City owes Franklin 25 dollars for the new Bidet Toilet System that was installed in the new City Outhouse which also acts as the City Hall. Blunders could theoretically pay this immediately, except that the coffee can containing the towns treasury has been missing since he lost it 2 years ago. The city has done massive search efforts to try and find the can which contains exactly 25 dollars. Unfortunately, Mayor Blunders can't remember where he put it.

"The city of Franklin is very gracious to extend this loan to a 25 year period" says one resident of the town "however, we can't afford to keep borrowing money like this."

The City taxes are already above the average citizens preference with each resident paying 3 cents a year. With the city only consisting of 20 residents, this brings the city income 40 cents short of the required dollar necessary to be paid to Franklin. In the contract which was signed for Franklin to cover the Bidet Toilet System, it has been agreed that if Oil City falls 3 years behind in payments, Franklin will become the new capital of the county.

"This is the worst possible scenario we can be in" stated another local.

Residents are not ready to give up on Blunders yet. Impeaching Blunders would result the vice Mayor taking over the town. With the vice Mayor being Blunders wife, the towns folk are hesitant because they are incredibly sexist. We say this because our goal as a satirical news source is to make people mad at us.

Blunders says that if any impeachment were to take place, he would not stand for it. The Mayor has set forth a plan to barricade himself in the Outhouse/City Hall if impeachment was inevitable. His strategy would be to cut all citizens off from the toilet until they agreed to reestablish him as Mayor.

As of right now, locals agree to hold out to see if Blunders can turn the tide for the town. We obviously know this isn't going to happen because it's Oil City. Nonetheless, the people remain optimistic because they are insane.