Facebook Page Goes Viral Reaching 6 Followers in 10 hours

The Venango Republic Facebook page is the talk of the town. Reaching 6 followers in less than a day, we nearly have 2/3rds of Oil Cities population subscribed to our news. Not only is this huge by Venango County standards, but Mayor Blunder has personally congratulated our CEO for the unforseen success.

"This is a big deal" says Jason Bourne, head of advertising for the Venango Republic. "This is six times as many subscribers as the local Derrick who, as of January 2025, reported only 1 person subscribed to their paper."

In addition to surpassing the Derrick, the Venango Republic believes they're on course to surpass their biggest competition, Explore Venango. Much like the Venango Republic, Explore Venango is known for getting on people's nerves, the difference being that while the Venango Republic is known for satirical news that is high quality, Explore Venango is known for real news that is low in quality.

In February of 2024, Explore Venango lost a networth of 50 cents when they dropped to 10 subscribers. The Venango Republic is confident that they not only will surpass that number, but eventually gain subscriptions from all 52 residents in the entire county.

The biggest question facing the competition is why people are leaving standard news for a satirical website. Firstly, we must remember that all journalists at the Venango Republic are college graduates from renowned universities. This does present a challenge to our writers as they must always remember to lower their standards to a second grade level keeping in mind that no one in Venango County has even reached middle school.

The fact that the educational standard is so low is advantageous for the Venango Republic. Take the Derrick for instance. Their only writer is working his way through preschool. We can tell by the way he spells their name.

"I think the main reason people are turning to us is because we make it seem like things are happening here" says Jason Bourne. When you consider the fact that nothing interesting ever happens in Venango County, it makes sense that people will grow bored with a serious newspaper that has nothing interesting to report. Bourne continues by saying "locals want to believe that Venango county is growing like a metropolis. We give them that opportunity by fabricating reality and feeding into that delusion."

The Venango Republic estimates that by next month, we will more than surpass the number of subscribers our competitors have. In fact, it is our goal to steal their subscribers completely. This is more than likely to happen because nobody knows what news to trust anymore, so why not turn to the one that feeds your ego?