Dumbdumb Calls on Blunders to Withdraw Troops from Meadville

The armies of the Pennsylvania Land and Treaty Organization, otherwise known as PLATO, are in a stalemate that has lasted for several weeks. Three militaries sent by Mercer, West Crawford, and Venango County have engaged the Zugnar Alliance in the Battle of Meadville only to find that the might of East Crawford, Warren, and Elk County is an equal match for the allies.

Meadville was overthrown several months ago, handing the entirety of West Crawford over to Mayor Dumbdumb of Titusville. Shortly thereafter, the Nation of Erie also fell, forming what is now known as the Crawfordiot Union.

Since the fall of these minor superpowers, Mayor Dumbdumb has imposed his will on the people of the new dictatorship. A finely pressed curtain had been hung across the border of Erie and West Crawford to divide the people between the Ironed Curtain.

Families on both sides have been warned not to cross over to avoid wrinkling the linen. Violators are subject to be shot with spitball fire on sight. So far, three people have been hit by spitballs while attempting to cross. Each instantly died of COVID.

In the midst of the conflict, the Battle of Meadville is still raging in the most boring fashion imaginable. Laurel and Hardy of the Venango County military are on their two hundred and seventy-fifth game of chess, all of which have ended in a stalemate.

The militaries have all agreed that the losers will withdraw. Mayor Dumbdumb, president of East Crawford and the newly formed Crawfordiot Union, says he does not want to wait any longer. Now, he is demanding the withdrawal of all PLATO militaries, lest another invasion take place on Venango soil.

Mayor Blunders of the Venango States of America says that he is ready for any invasion. He is lying. Venango's three military men are spread between West Crawford and Clarion. The only option available is an elderly soldier stationed in Pleasantville who keeps giving up the city when he falls asleep.

Dumbdumb knows the vulnerable state Venango is in thanks to their decision to send their soldiers away. Consequently, he is preparing an army of two men to invade Venango by way of Route 8. This is the same passage East Crawford used the last four times they attacked.

The conflict continues to escalate, and it seems that County War One has a long way to go. Although the author is getting sick of this storyline, he will do his best to finish it without rushing too quickly. UGH!!!!