Criminal Signs Guestbook: Police Have No Leads

Police are searching for a man who robbed Venango's wealthiest citezens during the county's annual ball. According to sources, the anonymous figure showed up to the event wearing the county's best idea of a tuxedo. Spectators noted how finely dressed the man seemd in his ripped overalls and coffee stained blazer. Shortly after recieving compliments from all five attendees, the man pulled a shotgun out of a gun case he was non-chalantly carrying with him.

Witnesses say that the man demanded the crowd hand over their valuables citing that he had a shotgun in the case he was holding. Taken back by the surprise of a gun being inside the gun case, the crowd did not hesitate to hand over their plastic beed jewelry and duct tape wallets. Sources say that the criminal made off with at least five dollars in valuables.

"I was very disapointed to lose my necklace" states Marsha Marsha Marsha. "Those beeds were passed down to me from my grandmother who inherited them from the craft store in the plastic beed section. They have been in my family for at least 3 generations; my grandma, my mom who we skipped to give the beeds to me, and my generation."

Fortunately, Marsha Marsha Marsha's beeds were covered by a very reliable insurence broker who promises to replace the necklace when he is out of school and when his mommy can take him to the store.

As for the criminal behind the theft, police say they have no leads whatsoever.

"We are extremely upset" says the event coordinator. "Not only do we have no leads to catch this robber, but he accidentally left his watch with his name inscribed. He did sign the guest list after showing his ID. However, we do not have a number to contact him so he can pick up his belongings. Not only are we unlikely to catch this criminal, but he is also missing a very expensive time keeping device worth at least fifteen dollars."