City of Warren Withstands Forest Attack
An attack on Warren was successfully deterred due to superior defenses. According to sources, Forest County conducted an operation to retaliate against Warren after several diapers were dropped on Tionesta last week.
The operation involved one soldier armed with a fishing pole ordered to march onto Warren. Upon arrival, the military began attacking structures by beating them with the fishing rod. To the dismay of the soldier, his weapons were inferior to the quality of the structures.
Forest County has had the least luck in the war of northwestern Pennsylvania. Late last week, the city of Marienville, capital of East Forest County, fell to the powers of East Crawford after two soldiers marched into town and set up lawn chairs. The city has not been able to convince them to leave.
Appeals to the Pennsylvania Land and Treaty Organization have resulted in no aid being received. PLATO, which consists of Mercer, West Crawford, Venango, Clarion, Forest, and Jefferson County, has an agreement that all counties will come to the defense of each other if they are attacked. Unfortunately, the shortage of troops, transportation, and funds has made it impossible for each county to accommodate more than one at a time.
Venango County was the first of the PLATO treaty to be attacked more than two weeks ago after East Crawford laid siege to Oil City’s north side. All but Forest and Mercer responded to the incident by sending military to the defense of Oil City. Currently, the only county capable of sending support to Forest is Mercer, which would have to travel across Venango County war zones to reach their ally.
Traveling by way of Butler is not an option, since Mercer has had past disputes over religious preferences of juice and hummus. Butlerstein will not allow Mercer to pass through their nation at this time.
For the time being, Forest stands alone in the war between PLATO and the enemies of East Crawford and Warren. The damage is high by low standards, but liberty will be fought for at all costs. Fishing poles will break, diapers will be dropped, but the freedom of PLATO will be fought to the last man… which is not that many….
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