Blunders Meets With Pittsburgh Mayor to Negotiate Gulf of Venango

It was reported that on arrival, Mayor Blunders went into shock upon seeing the height of the Pittsburgh skyscrapers. "Heavens to Betsy!" Shouted the Mayor "I did dung forgot to bring my change of underwear!"

Blunders entered the city of Pittsburgh blown away by the massive infrastructure. Until this point, he thought Oil City had the biggest high rises. Now he thinks Pittsburgh is the pinnacle of what humans have achieved.

The Venango County Secret Service escorted Mayor Blunders to the office of Pittsburghs Mayor where upon arrival, the secretary asked "who are you supposed to be?"

Mayor Blunders insisted he had sent a wire days ahead of time using Oil Cities public telegraph machine. The secretary, confused because she didn't know what a telegraph machine was, pulled out her cell phone to Google the term.

"Hey Google" said the secretary "what is a telegraph machine?"

Google responds "a telegraph machine, or electric telegraph, is a device that transmits information by coded signals over a distance, primarily using electrical signals transmitted via wires, and is often associated with the use of Morse code."

Mayor Blunders, along with the secret service men, stood in shock. "Did that square saucer just talk?"

"Hey Google" said the secretary "what is Morse code?"

Google responds "Morse code is a communication method that uses short and long signals, known as dots and dashes, to transmit letters as text. Samuel Morse invented the code in 1836 for sending messages over telegraph wires. It is not often used in the modern world."

The Mayor and his service men looked stunned by the technology in front of them. "What is this place we have come to?"

Suddenly, Mr. Steelhead, Mayor of Pittsburgh, entered the room. The Mayor Blunders stands amazed while looking at Mayor Steelhead, who literally has a steel beam sticking out of his head.

"Who are these men Miss secretary?" Asked Mr Steelhead.

"These men are from Venango County." Said the secretary.

"What's a Venango?" Asked Mayor Steelhead.

Mayor Blunders interjects stating that they are there to negotiate a name change for the Allegheny River. "We have more of a right to the river than your county. We are further north and the river changes names after running through your city anyway."

Mayor Steelhead looks at Blunders as if he is insane. "You are more than a week too early for April fools. I have a city to run!"

"Please Mr. Steelhead" said Mayor Blunders "allow us to plead our case..."

"I know exactly who you are" Stated Steelhead "You are the one who keeps having Chinese food delivered to us with a note claiming it as payment for the river..."

"It's just a peace offering" stated Blunders.

"How is it a peace offering when you stick me with the bill?" Asked Steelhead "and who orders two thousand pounds of lomein?"

Blunders tried to express his stance the best he could but was shut down when they Pittsburgh Mayor slammed his office door. Mayor Blunders has since returned from Pittsburgh and is planning to raise terrifs on Pittsburgh to 50 percent despite the fact we never trade with them.