Beaver County Offers to Take Erie's Fallen Trees

A major storm rocked the city of Erie last Wednesday, leaving many without trees. Now, Mayor Dambuilder of Aliquippa, capital of Beaver County, states that he is willing to take the vegetation off the hands of Erie's capital of Erie.

In a press briefing today, Mayor Dambuilder told reporters that the fallen trees are an opportunity to help resolve the homeless crisis plaguing Beaver residents in the Ohio River. For months, Dambuilder has promised to construct new dams with the hope of resolving the housing shortage.

Dambuilder speaks to press at Aliquippa City Hall

Statistics show that several beavers are damless and are not able to afford the bare necessities before winter comes.

Dambuilder has reached out to Mayor Paranoia of Erie's capital of Erie. Mayor Paranoia states that he is willing to ship all the trees down to Beaver County on the condition that pricing is fair.

Unfortunately, Beaver County's only means of trade is the offering of logs in return for the trees being requested from Erie. Because Beaver County thrives in the logging industry, they don't know how else to trade other than giving neighboring counties logs for additional logs.

Mayor Paranoia of Erie has since turned down the offer, stating that receiving more trees would defeat the purpose of getting rid of the current trees. Instead, he asks that Dambuilder consider forming another kind of currency that can justify trade between the counties.